My Dysfunctional Family
by Silkoena
Summary: Shadow has been acting strangely...er... for the past six months. Spacing off, disappearing with no warning... It's starting to worry his friends and his superiors. What could possibly be bothering him? During a joint raiding operation, maybe the answer will reveal itself without needing any prying. Rated T for swearing. Personalized Comic AU.
1. Chapter 1

**Alright, this is my first fanfic so please be gentle. I'm sorry if any characters are OOC but in Shadow's case, it's kinda the point. Instructive and positive reviews are welcomed, but please no pointless hating. It's a waste if your time for writing it, and a waste of my time for reading it. **

**This is based on the comic world of Sonic the Hedgehog, but I made my own little changes. For a first, Sally did date Sonic, but they never got back together after they broke up. Sally was never roboticized. There might be more that I can't think of right now, so I'll warn you before the chapters start if I need to explain things. Also, this takes place after the whole King Ixis Naugus and roboticized Sally arc, but I won't mention it a lot since it's not finished yet.**

**Disclaimer: I only own the plot. Character belong to SEGA and Ian Flynn.**

_**My Dysfunctional Family**_

_**Chapter 1**_

Today was a normal day. Sun was high and bright in a almost cloudless sky and a cool breeze blew soothingly. Yep, a perfect sunny day out here on Mobius.

**New Mobotropolis - 10:23**

"Come oooon, Sal! Why does it have to be us to go? I thought the all diplomatic stuff was left for your brother!" whined the annoyed blue hedgehog.

"Eli's the king, yes, but he simply doesn't have the time to travel to G.U.N's headquarters with the council constantly disagreeing. Plus, he's got Alexis to take care of. So stop acting like a child and come." answered the princess, an exasperated look on her face.

"But I don't wanna deal with the faker! WHY do we even have to go?" he pouted, crossing his arms clearly showing that he did NOT want to go.

"Because the commander has a joint mission proposition for us and of course, you'll be in on it, Mister Hero. And you're not going to have to deal with Shadow. Well, not alone anyways. That's why Amy, Tails and Knuckles are coming. If Shadow shows up, Rouge will most likely be there too. We're NOT leaving you two on your own. Who knows what kind of chaos would ensue..." Sonic raised his eyebrows as she mentioned the echidna.

"Red is coming? Why?" he asked, surprise and curiosity lacing his tone, completely ignoring the rest of her speech.

"The proposition involves a lot of factions. Freedom fighters, G.U.N, Chaotix and the like. Maybe Julie-Su, Vector, Espio and Charmy will be there too." Sally shrugged.

"What's the deal? What kind of mission needs all those people?" he asked yet again, astonished.

"That's what we're going to find out, if you would only agree to come!" the squirrel balled her hands in loose fists and put them on her hips, reproach and exasperation clear in her voice.

"Fine, fine..." Sonic sighed. _Not cool, _he thought.

**G.U.N HQ - Debriefing room - 11:45**

"- and if that doesn't work out, there'll be a shuttle waiting on docking bay 57 on level 4 for extraction. Consider it an if-everything-else-fails route." finished the commander pointing to a certain spot on the blueprint of the building, projected on the white wall, with a red-dot laser.

"So, let me get this straight..." started off Sally, "You want us to barge in this Dark Egg Legion supply factory, destroy everything and anything in our line of sight, and evacuate before the building blows sky high?" she asked, an _are-you-serious_ expression plastered on her face.

Sonic shrugged, laid-back comfortably in his seat.

"Sounds fine to me. Ain't much different than what we usually do. I really don't see what the big deal is, Sal."

"Wha-? Well, mister, we _usually_ have a plan. But you never follow it. So of course you don't see a difference!" she snapped back.

If looks could kill, Sonic knew he would be six feet under.

Fortunately, Knuckles stepped in before any argument erupted.

"It works out though, most of the time. And we're not completely devoid of a plan. We've got our routes and objectives laid out. Julie and I board a supply ship next camp over and wreck the loading area. Vector, Charmy and Espio bust in from the front door and spread chaos through the lobby. Blue and Tails simply go around doing what they do best (since they'd never follow the plan if we gave them one) while Amy, NICOLE and you sneak through the vents and take over the central computer. Shadow, the bat and the robot drop in from above and prevent anyone from taking any gunships from the roof. Bunnie and her husband fly the shuttles in the forest not too far and guard it. G.U.N. soldiers will come in after the initial attacks die down and help the best they can, am I right?"

"Wow, Red. So you're NOT as dumb as you look!" the hedgehog teased.

"Shut up!"

"By the way..."he wondered aloud, ignoring Knuckles, "Where's the faker? Isn't he supposed to be here?"

"Agent Shadow has already been debriefed. Only God knows where he is right now." the commander explained.

"But Rouge is here, along with Omega." the azure hedgehog remarked.

"So?" said bat replied, "Everyone needs some time alone, especially him."

"But you're right."

Everyone stopped and stared to the one who uttered that last sentence. It was the commander. His faced took on an expression of seriousness and gravity. Well, more so than usual.

"Excuse me?" asked Sally.

"Agent Shadow is- _was_ supposed to be here."

"Then why ain't he?" questioned the blue blur yet again.

"He requested to be brought up to date yesterday. It was completely random too. This isn't the first time too if you've noticed. Agent Rouge?"

"Well sure, he spaces out more frequently as of late, but nothing major. He's always so grumpy! Maybe the stress is catching up to him..." she answered, confused.

"If you've paid that much attention, you must've noticed he keeps on disappearing then." remarked Abraham.

"But he always does that-" she was rudely cut off before she could further her response.

"Oi! C'mon old man! Where're you gettin' at?" Sally slapped her ex-boyfriend on the back of the head.

"You don't call the _commander_ of G.U.N such a derogatory term!"

"It's alright, princess. My nephew isn't much better. And he has a point. So let me cut to the chase. Shadow has been acting strangely lately, more so than usual. His disappearances have doubled in number and go on to as long as half a day. He spaces out and seems on edge _constantly_. About six months ago, he still relaxed his posture when entering the base."

Nobody butted in with a comment, instructive or not, this time. They all waited in silence, inviting the human to continue.

"Of course, such attitude doesn't justify an investigation but-"

"Woah!" exclaimed the conversation's topic's partner, "Stop right there! _Investigation? _Are you saying Shadow's some sort of spy or something?"

"Of course not!" he defended, a flash of horror crossing his otherwise expressionless face, "But this new comportment is ticking me off, Ms. Kintobor too. It's not much to go on. I'm probably just being paranoid, but nothing has happened these past six months that might've hinted to trouble him. The last thing that shook him up was his worry that he was considered a weapon and no more. You must remember. It was the same time Omega was recruited. And that was two years ago!"

"So you're saying something's happened to him and he's not telling us about it? That's not new much." the previously quiet Amy spoke up.

"On the contrary," Rouge stated, "It's just that not much fazes him. The only time he keeps to himself is when he wants to defy orders or about to break a promise (or when he wants to kill everyone on the planet because of faulty memory, but that was a loooooong time ago)."

"Hmm..." she racked her brain for any memory that could be used to counter that argument. Even when Blaze lost her Sol Emerald, not retrieving it went against orders, "You're right! He never smiles, but he expresses his concerns when those two things are out of the way. I never noticed..."

"Can't blame ya, kid. Took me a year of working with him to do so." the bat shrugged.

"But back on topic," interfered the commander, "All I want you to do is look out for any other strange quirks. If possible, even subtly try and find what's bothering him."

"Sure thing!" cheered Sonic, always ready to help, "Though I doubt anything'll turn up. That guy is as stiff and stubborn as a rock."

**G.U.N Landing Dock - the next day 10:45**

The next morning was not any different than the day before. Sky was clear, the sun shone brightly and only few white, fluffy cumuli dared to show up. Around a cluster of five shuttles were grouped a strange assortment of people, most of which were chatting idly; the others either staring into infinity or engrossed in their new aventure game for their portable gaming console. Sonic, Sally, Amy, Tails, Antoine D'Coolette, his wife Bunnie, Knuckles, Julie-Su, Charmy, Vector, Espio, Rouge, Omega and previously missing Shadow were gathered, waiting for the pilots to finish on their before-liftoff checkup. The mood, if one was to only pass by, would seem light and lively despite the dangerous mission that lay ahead, but if they would only pay more attention, they would notice something lacked. Something..._ natural_. It was true, everyone was a little tense since the chat they had about one of their companions yesterday. They would steal a few glances at the ebony hedgehog, but said hedgehog seemed too distracted to notice. By what, nobody knew. And that only agitated them further. And they didn't understand why they were fidgety in the first place!

Finally, they were allowed to board their respective shuttles. Antoine and Bunnie the one used for evacuation, Sonic, Tails, Sally, Amy, Vector, Espio, Charmy, Julie-Su and Knuckles the drop-off one and Shadow, Rouge and Omega the one who would fly over the roof. A dozen of G.U.N soldiers settled in the one farthest left while two pilots and four soldiers stepped foot into the one right beside. Other humans were rushing around to clear the zone or to embark on other shuttles on the other side of the dock.

҉

The flight went without a hitch. No missiles, no ambush, no nothing. By the time they arrived, Sonic was yawning widely and dozing off. They had already dropped off the pair of echidnas at the supply camp they were to infiltrate half-an hour back.

The co-pilot, who was until then doing whatever co-pilots do, turned around in his seat and said in a not-so-bored voice:

"We're arriving in about a minute. You better be ready."

"No biggie, pal!" Sonic stifled a yawn. A minute for him felt like an hour.

They finally landed just outside the factory's radars' range. In the distance, they could see Shadow's shuttle coming. They all turned to each other, nodded and went off with their partners, the slower teams getting on all-terrain vehicles provided by G.U.N.

**Knuckles and Julie-Su's side**

The two echidnas were peeking over a corner. So far, so good. The supple crafts were lifting off in about five minutes, giving them more than enough time to make their way there. Silently making their way to their objective, they quickly hid between tents as a patrol rounded a corner and into their line of sight. They waited for it to pass by before making their way deeper into the camp.

A few close calls later, they finally hopped on a cargo plane full of different sized crates. They hid behind one as a legionnaire made his way to trap them in. Once everything became dark, they allowed themselves to release a breath they hadn't realised they were holding.

_**(time skip, 'cause nothing happens)**_

They felt the little bump that usually accompanied landings, and stood right behind the exit, in an attack stance. Little did the legionnaires know they were about to set hell loose by pressing the button to open the back of the shuttle.

The metal plank wasn't even three-quarters of the way down before Knuckles and Julie-Su sprung out. Immediately, the male punched the closest legionnaire in the face, sending him sprawling to the floor. Julie-Su took out her tazer gun and stunned two hooded figures before they could snap out of their surprise.

The two made their way to the wall right across from them and pulled the fire alarm, sending the sprinklers off. Some legionnaires started to panic, running around in a chaos, while others, who had spotted the intruders, made their way to surround them. Unfortunately for them, the two echidnas found themselves a dry enough spot. The pink one then dropped her tazer in the water, electrocuting anyone and everyone standing in a puddle (which was the totality of the dock).

Grinning to each other, Julie bent down and carefully switched her weapon off.

Now that everyone but them was unconscious on the ground, they got on to step three of their task: _sack the supplies._

**Amy, Sally and NICOLE's side**

They drove all the way around the factory to a rather unguarded area out back. They parked a little ways in the forest and made their way discreetly to their way in: the AC vent. Making sure to not step on any twigs or ruffle the leaves too much, they sneaked behind the lone, bored and evidently half-asleep guard.

Amy summoned up her piko piko hammer and of a quick strike, knocked him out cold. While the pink hedgehog checked for any kind of useful intel on the legionnaire, Sally made her way to the vent and from her vest, pulled out a screwdriver. With its help, she dismantled the grille.

Amy went in first and then Sally. The auburn squirrel unstrapped NICOLE's portable device from her leg. Up until then, everything went down in the most quiet.

"NICOLE, can you load up the blueprints of this building?" asked the one holding the AI.

"Of course, Sally. Here." An image of a brown and black-striped feline showed for a second and then quickly disappeared, a blue and white screen taking its place.

"Where to?" asked Amy with her usual high-pitched voice.

"Continue straight and then turn right at the fourth intersection." the elder instructed.

And so they made their way to the middle of the building. The hedgehog leading and the squirrel making sure they didn't get lost. A few turns and uncomfortable crawling afterwards, they came over a grille. Down below was the computer room, where the security cameras' feed came in, along with radio communications and the like. Only two places in the whole building had those things: this room and the Superior's office on the first-before-last (fifth) floor.

The two females eyed the space below them. There were two hooded legionnaires sitting down and staring at the screens, about eight others monitoring communications around the circular room and the two infiltrators spotted two or three figures running around with high stacks of papers in their arms. So about thirteen soldiers to take care of, and then they could put a stop to all the manufacturing with the press of a button.

Ever so slowly, Amy carefully removed the grill and slipped down, landing with barely any sound. She slowly made her way, hammer in hand, to one of the running-around legionnaires and whacked him hard. The loud _PIKO! _of the hit and the thud of a body collapsing onto the ground were the only warning the other officers had before they were knocked unconscious by a pink menace.

Sally, while that was going on, stealthily lounged the left of the room and made her way to the security controls. Once there, she took out NICOLE's USB cord and plugged it into an available port. The AI immediately went to work. A progress bar popped up on the screen, filling up about a percent every two seconds. Cracking firewalls after firewalls, layer after layer, NICOLE finally gained control over the whole facility just as the progress bar marked 100%.

"First," instructed Sally, "Open the doors for the Chaotix, then stop all production at once."

"On it."

Amy stood guard behind the only door in, armed and dangerous.

**Vector, Espio and Charmy's side**

The three detectives had already arrived with the motocrosses five long minutes ago. Espio had turned invisible, snuck up behind the two guards, one on duty, the other one munching on some snack, easily disarmed them and then Vector surprised them while they were distracted with the chameleon by knocking them both on the head. With now both legionnaires K.O-ed, they were patiently waiting for the girl's team to open up the doors for them.

Charmy had brought his PSP with him, Vector was listening to his ever-so present walkman and Espio entertained himself by kicking pebbles when the doors finally opened, giving them the go ahead to wreck the place.

Vector and Charmy, the more impatient ones, charged in first and didn't waste their time into terrorizing everyone present. Espio followed in quietly; nobody noticed him, being too distracted with a seemingly rabid crocodile and a crazed bee, y'know?

The young insect went flying around, mostly annoying the legionnaires instead of neutralizing them. Pulling their hoods, lifting the smaller ones ten foot in the air, then dropping them down and catching them last second, nearly giving them a heart-attack each time.

Vector, on the other hand, went all-out. Fists flying, tail tripping, jaw snapping... All he needed was a bloodlust expression on his face and he would be all set to make everyone believe he had rabies. Of course, Espio had to watch his back as the crocodile was all attack and no defense. The chameleon pulled out ninja stars out of seemingly nowhere and started pinning officers to the walls by their clothes.

As they made their way to the balcony of the lobby, the pink reptile camouflaged himself and climbed the wall with his adherent paws, Vector following closely and running up the stairs. Meanwhile, Charmy went on and started throwing any papers he could find into the air, and with the AC running from both sides of the room, the loose sheets went flying in random directions.

The older two made quick work of the guards on the second floor, and joined Charmy in his little "cover enough of the floor so as to not see any carpet" game.

**Shadow, Rouge and Omega's side**

When they arrived above the landing platform with a huge, white "H" painted on it, the alarms were already going off. A few legionnaires had already made it to the roof and had taken off with attack ships, but they would eventually be tackled down to the ground by either a blue blur or a young orange fox when they would fly lower.

Both agents hopped down their ride and gracefully landed on the vast airfield, quickly followed by a heavy mechanical monster that dropped down with a loud _Clang!_ All three then split up to different areas of the circular battlefield.

Rouge headed to the north-east side, right across from where her non-robotic partner went. That part of the roof was occupied with different evacuation shuttles, so there weren't a lot of legionnaires, but orders were to neutralize all air transport, even the ones the enemy wouldn't be using. She flew around, knocking off stoppers and when she couldn't, she used her spinning kick to destroy the aircraft entirely. Once or twice, guards would escape Shadow and Omega and try to stop her, but she made quick work of them.

Omega, on the other hand, had quite a bit of difficulty at performing his task. He went over to the south side, where the door to the roof was located. Of course, that meant that every guard retreating up here was to meet the barrel of Omega's arm/machine gun. Unfortunately, there were more guards than the robot could handle, but Shadow was right behind him to take care of them, and if they somehow managed to pass the hedgehog, Rouge was there.

About five minutes after they had begun battling, they heard reports from the other teams from their communicator. Knuckles and Julie-Su had moved on to the dock next level up while Amy kept legionnaires at bay in the control room even though they were growing in number. Vector, Charmy and Espio had advanced into the building and were now wandering through the hallways.

That's when the door leading inside burst open and an earth-shaking roar was heard from miles away.

Right before their eyes stood the most horrendous creature. It was twice Omega's size, with blood-shot eyes and saliva dripping from his mouth. His snarl gave away his huge fangs and his messy red fur only accentuated his black sclera. You could easily tell it was an echidna before the Legion did... whatever the hell they did to him.

Taking a few steps back, Rouge pressed two fingers to the receiver near her ear and called for backup. All teams but one were too far away to do anything, and she knew Shadow was too high on adrenaline to realize this would prove a _tad bit_ too much for him to handle.

The monster charged straight forward, shoving his "allies" to the side, heading straight for Omega. The robot switched his jet-propulsors upwards and flew himself high up in the air, nearly avoiding the crazed mutant. Said mutant crashed right into the line of shuttles that Rouge had yet to take down.

Profiting of the abomination's dazed and confused state, the black hedgehog jumped on its back, summoning a chaos spear. Unfortunately for him, the overgrown ant-eater rapidly recovered from impact when he felt an unfamiliar weight on him. He violently shook it off, sending Shadow flying and crashing on the safety wall around the platform.

The white bat tried to kick him on the forehead with one of her infamous drill kicks, but was easily swatted away like an annoying fly and sent tumbling over the edge.

**Sonic and Tails' side a few minutes before**

The hero and his ever-so-faithful sidekick made their way faster than any team to the factory. When they had arrived, they immediately bolted up the side of the building and entered through one of the open, as to let through the supply shuttles, cargo areas.

They didn't even bother to take care of the legionnaires there and started running (or in Tails' case, flying) through the corridors. With a spin dash or a well-placed punch to the face, they knocked down any guard they came across. They went through a few armories, break rooms and workshops before they heard all the alarms suddenly blazing.

As if on cue, they stopped terrorizing the engineers around the conveyor belt they were riding and sprinted (though it was quite far away from where they were) to the fifth floor where the bossman would probably be.

As they reached they passed the laboratories on the fourth floor, their communicators went off with a static sound before Knuckles' voice came in, followed by Sally's and Espio's (who was rudely cut off by Vector crying they found the computer room and Charmy going on about random things that didn't make any sense).

A loud cavernous cry was then heard, promptly followed by Rouge's voice over the communicator.

"We've got a bit of a situation over here, boys. Mind lending a hand?"

Not needing to ask who the "boys" were, the duo broke in a recently abandoned lab and jumped out the window. Running/Flying full speed, they passed their previous objective and headed to the roof. Halfway there though, a white dot that quickly grew into a very feminine shape met them. Just in time before colliding, Rouge managed to finally open her wings and avoid an impact that would have surely left her with a very painful bruise.

Barely sparing her a questioning glance, all three made their way (back) up. Another roar was heard along with Omega's missiles firing. Rouge and Tails gracefully flew over the small fence boarding the edges of the roof and took the left and right flanks respectively while Sonic went straight forward and made a mad spindash at the monsters abdomen, successfully cutting any air circulation.

The surprise hit was immediately joined by a few tracking missiles landing their target, a drill kick to the right shoulder, multiple tail swipes to the face and a chaos spear to the lower back.

All these attacks performed at the same time caused the abomination to topple over and trip down to ground zero, just like Rouge mere minutes ago.

The monster's fall was punctuated with a long and cavernous roar, followed by a loud thud and the sound of bones breaking, then absolute silence, save for the pants of the surviving legionnaires.

Said legionnaires, after witnessing the defeat of the most hazardous element in their arsenal, spared each other a glance and then made a run for the exit. No hedgehog, bat, fox or robot made a move to stop them, as the objective was to destroy the factory after all, not make the most victims.

Now the only ones on the roof, they could hear the sounds of battle from below them. However, they slowly died down, and all were waiting for the first team to make a progress report.

Suddenly, all the communicators buzzed to life. First, Julie-Su and Knuckles reported they had finished wrecking most of the docks and were now moving to the armory hangars. Vector and Espio had to get to the infirmary because Charmy had one of his wings shot, NICOLE was still hacking the second set of monitors in the Boss' office while Sally was downloading the last of the intel on an USB key and Amy was chasing a few guards around the room. Shadow and Rouge briefed the others, warned them about possibly other rampaging mutants and asked Sally to specifically search for data on that matter.

"Supply factory, my eye..." grumbled Tails, "What kind of things ARE they conducting over here?"

"Certainly not what we thought they were. But it doesn't matter now, this place will not figure in any map after we're finished." assured Shadow.

Sonic opened his mouth to put in his two cents to the conversation when he was cut off by the factory's intercom coming to life, the shrill sound of static deafening their ears for a moment.

The light sound of a finger tapping the microphone was heard before a low and commanding voice leaving no place for argument took its place.

"Alright, all-fleshies.*bzzt* I won't say this twice so listen up! We've got one of your friends. Surrender now *bzzt* or I'll execute Mobius' *bzzt* so-called Ultimate Life Form on the spot."

The sound of a gun being cocked resounded threw the megaphones all around the building, but the raiders' minds were still processing what they had just heard. Shadow? Caught? Not is that only impossible, but they heard him report only seconds ago! But they wouldn't make such a lousy bluff if it wasn't real, right?

It was worse up on the roof. Sonic, Tail, Omega and Rouge were all staring wide-eyed (if Omega can widen the light bulbs on either side of his "face" that is) at the ebony hedgehog right in front of them. What do they mean, "we have him"? He was right here!

While Rouge was trying to figure out why in the world they would use such an easily identifiable lie as a last resort, Sonic's thoughts were going down a darker road.

The ol' man back at G.U.N. yesterday had said that Shadow had been acting strangely lately. He's had enough imposters of himself, voluntarily or not, and he wouldn't be surprised if Shadow had his own little "me" community. That, and the androids. Maybe the one here was a fake, and that the Dark Egg Legion really had Shadow? But he was his rival (not that he would ever admit he wasn't stronger)! How could he possibly let himself be kidnapped! Maybe they're bluffing. But wouldn't they know that he would at least be with Rouge? Or all they wanted was to spread confusion so they could get away? Because it was certainly working. Ugh... All this thinking was going to give him a headache...

Little did he know, more or less the same thoughts were going through everyone heads, except for the ebony hedgehog in question. Actually, he seemed rather panicked at the moment, not that anyone noticed, as he had his back to them.

"*bzzt* Don't believe me?" asked the Boss, "Well *bzzt* hear him for yourselves."

_What... _they thought.

"Awright!" a new voice resounded. It was certainly Shadow's, although... "Thay kinda strapped a bunch o' C-4 o'er mah chest 'n' tied me up tae a chair? Sae aye... Save me? Please?"

It was DEFINITELY _not_ him.


	2. Chapter 2

_**My Dysfunctional Family**_

_**Chapter 2**_

_"*bzzt* Don't believe me?" asked the Boss, "Well *bzzt* hear him for yourselves."_

What... _they thought._

_"Awright!" a new voice resounded. It was certainly Shadow's, although... "Thay kinda strapped a bunch o' C-4 o'er mah chest 'n' tied me up tae a chair? Sae aye... Save me? Please?"_

_It was DEFINITELY _not_ him._

-҉-

And it was with those words that the minds of every freedom fighter, Chaotix and G.U.N. agent tried to comprehend (emphasize on tried), failed, shut down, rebooted, processed and still came out with only one, identical thought:

_What. The. Fuck._

That pretty much summed it all up.

The voice was Shadow's, even with the accent, which was an impossibility on its own, but the simple fact that this "Shadow" nonchalantly asked for help, or even said the word _please_, completely defied (nature and) reality.

Now, most teams wouldn't be too sure anymore, but the most-certainly real Shadow was on the roof, just as shocked and confuse, though for a somewhat different reason.

Snapping out of her daze, Rouge promptly reached for her communicator as to clear this confusing-as-hell misunderstanding.

"I don't know who that was, but it wasn't Shadow. He is right here in front of me! So everything is fine. I think... They're obviously bluffing, very badly yes, as a last resor-"

"FRIGGIN' USELESS PIECE OF TRASH! DAMN MORON!" Shadow's voice cut in very loudly, sounding thoroughly pissed, even more so than when he's dealing with Sonic. (Which is like a Guinness World record of pissed off, if you get my drift.)

Said blue hedgehog, along with the others up on the roof, stared, wide-eyed and lost, at their fuming companion.

You could practically see the vein popping out of his forehead and the steam coming out of his ears.

He stood there, eyes wild, fists clenched and snarling with his teeth tightly shut, glaring at the speaker as if sheer will power could strangle anyone on the other end.

He then continued on ranting to the mysterious imposter (?).

"HOW THE HELL DID YOU END UP HERE? I EVEN LEFT YOU IN THE SAFEST, ISOLATED PLACE I COULD THINK OF, YOU STUPID SACK OF SHIT!"

"Oi!" an identical, yet a bit static voice defended, "Tis nae as if ye cannae uise that place anymair! Ah gaed oot tae buy something tae ate 'n' thay thought ah wis ye, sae thay kidnapped me!"

"That's even worse! I told you to stay put! I even left you with enough food to last a week, too!"

"Naethin' sweet though..."

The Ultimate Life Form seemed to lose all composure at those three words. His tense shoulders slouched, his face took on an expression between disgust and disbelief and his left eye started to twitch.

Then he facepalmed.

"Just tell me where you are so I can properly beat you to a pulp..." he sighed.

"Daent knae, thay covered mah heid wi' a bag. Thir's a lot o' TV's though... Aye! Thir's yin wi' ye oan it! Oh mae gaed, ye'r faece is priceless! -"

"Someone shut him up!" someone shrieked over the microphone, "He's giving out our location!"

Shadow very much obliged.

"Alright! I get it! Boss' office! I'm coming! Try not to get killed in the meantime..." he added, exasperated.

The ebony hedgehog started walking towards the exit to the rooftop. Mere seconds ago, he was high on adrenaline and yelling at the top of his lungs and here he was, seemingly exhausted and about to collapse any minute now.

"Na promises. Althoogh... Cuid yo send yin o` yer pals instead? Ah kind o' value mah lee, ye knae?"

"Because letting yourself get captured by hooded people is valuing your life." Shadow mumbled under his breath.

"Ah heard that!"

-҉-

"Shadow the hedgehog!" yelled a quite irritated white bat, "Stop ignoring me! What the hell is going on? Who was that on the intercom!? SHADOW!"

The ebony hedgehog hadn't wasted his time on the roof after the legionnaires ended the broadcast in a deafening screech. He had gone straight down the stairs, but didn't use his speed to get there faster. The sound of the door slamming shut snapped the others out of their trances and they quickly rushed down after their secretive friend.

They had met up with the other teams on the fifth floor. On the sixth, the captain in charge of the second attack wave contacted them, asking if he should deploy his soldiers or not. Shadow had instructed him to wait until he had saved, and quote: _"this sorry excuse of a living being"_.

Either he didn't really care about his mysterious Scottish friend or he wanted the others to be able to keep up, but he certainly wasn't in a hurry, that's for sure. And the building was even built in a way that slowed their course! The only way down or up was the elevator right in the middle of the building, but it was shut down after the intruder alarms went off, and the stairs that were built on different sides of the building at each floor. On the sixth floor, the stairs were on the south side, on the fifth, the north side, on the fourth, the south side again, and so on.

All the way, Shadow had been bombarded by questions. He refused to answer them, or to even speak. But enough was enough. His patience had its limits, and with Sonic AND the idiot who let himself get kidnapped, it was on an extra-short fuse.

They were almost there when something inside him snapped. He whipped around, startling the ones following him close behind, clearly trying to suppress his rage.

"Alright you guys," he managed to say through clenched teeth, "I'll explain everything to you once I get the moron back. For now, could you just SHUT UP? I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to get Stupid back while 'accidently' injuring him in the process."

"Um... Wouldn't he dislike that?" interjected Amy.

Shadow turned around and started marching off again. They still had a million questions waiting to be asked, but they knew better than to aggravate their friend's mood, as it would certainly affect the fate of "Stupid".

"He's used to it." the ebony hedgehog answered.

That was... well... disturbing. More or less.

-҉-

When they arrived at the headmaster's office, NICOLE hadn't even opened the thick metal door more than an inch and they were already greeted with rapid gunfire.

Shadow, Sonic and Knuckles dove in head first while Tails and Rouge flew above the bullet storm and the others took refuge on either side of the door, behind the wall.

The room was a mess. Loose sheets of paper flew around in random directions, many obstructing the view of the shooters, while said shooters had taken cover behind the controls that circled the center of the room. At the very middle stood what most likely once was a comfy chair for the highest-up, but that was now shredded and burned on the backside for unknown reasons.

The echidna had run straight to the closest legionnaire and had delivered him a very powerful and maybe lethal right hook. The guard's gun clattered to the ground.

"Knux!"

He only turned his head to the right a tiny bit when he felt the cold barrel of a pistol pressed against his temple. Suddenly, out of the corner of his eyes, he saw a light blue flash, almost turquoise, and the pressure to the side of his head was gone. He looked over his shoulder to see his girlfriend crouched at the left side of the door, pointing her tazer pistol slightly to his right. He flashed her a thank-you smile and resumed his face-bashing.

Further into the room, two hedgehogs were spindashing across the room time and time again. The legionnaires only had time to see a blue or black blur before the felt their head hit the ground and conscience leave their mind.

Two minutes later, everyone hooded person in the room was K.-O. That was when they heared a muffled voice coming from behind the control boards. They were immediately on their guard and the ones equipped with weapons, raised them at the source of the sound. Before they could take action though, Shadow calmly walked over, blocking their trajectory.

Realizing who exactly made that noise, they relaxed and kept their gaze on the G.U.N agent. Curiosity, excitement, fear and worry almost radiated from their bodies and burned a whole on Shadow's back.

He bent down over the panels, reached his right hand down and yanked something... _someone_ up.

The body landed with a soft thud on the ground. While they had marched their way down here, it would seem that the legionnaires had put back the bag over their captive's head, but had released him from the chair. His hands were still tied behind his back though by what seemed like a very thick and robust piece of cord along with his feet. The Scotsman wore brown leather gloves, white dress pants with a silver chain attached to the front and back and would be resting on his left hip if he were standing up, black, red, yellow and white skater shoes along with a red hoodie. However, strapped over the hoodie was another weird looking vest.

"Watch it! Dinnae detonate th' bomb, ye dummie! Whit if this wasn't a stable explosive lik' C-4, huh? Whit wid ye huv dane in that caese?" the stranger cried.

"But it is." Shadow responded in the utmost monotone voice, "You even told me so over the intercom, or did you forget? Are you saying I should not trust you, the 'Master of All Explosives'?"

"Juist hulp me sit up 'n' tak' th' darn bag aff mah heid, ye smartarse."

And so he did. The others were still staring, but had not made a sound during the whole interaction. They had stopped a long time ago to try and guess who exactly this was, but even if they were, their surprise wouldn't have differed in the least.

The stranger plopped down and leaned on the side of the controls, releasing a muffled sigh. Shadow took off the bag and they (Sonic, Tails, Amy, Sally, Knuckles, Julie-Su, Vector, Charmy, Espio, Rouge and Omega) did a double-take and stepped back a bit. They couldn't believe their eyes and their brain had a hard time keeping up and making logic out of all this confusion.

Right next to Shadow laid an almost exact replica. His skin a yellowish, his fur was mostly black with a read streak starting from the middle of the forehead and up the middle quill. However, upon closer examination, his traits were a bit softer, his eyes more gentle, caring and warm. His ears were pierced with a golden earring on the left one and three silver studs on both. Resting under his chin and on his chest was a pair of dark blue motorcycle goggles. The ones with a slight image of his profile could see that his quills were shorter and not of the same shape. The two highest pointed downwards like Sonic, but the lowest one angled up, like Shadow.

"How-" someone started. They weren't even sure if they were the one talking or not.

"Guys," interrupted Shadow, "I'd like to introduce you to the one who almost messed up the whole operation, he's my... brother." he finished, as if he had a hard time believing that too.

-҉-

_Holy shit hell god almighty. _

Rouge almost fainted on the spot.

Sonic was guaranteed a massive headache.

Amy lost her footing, but caught herself before she crashed onto the floor.

"Does not compute" kept on flashing in Omega's mind.

Knuckles was stock still, eyes wide.

Espio was shocked, to say the least, that he didn't know that already, spy skills and everything.

And everyone exploded at the same time.

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATT?"

The "brothers", as it would seem, each kept on an identical poker face, which was kind of disturbing and distracting as they both had the same face.

"Ye heard him." the short-quilled brother said. Then his face split into a wide smile, his eyes filled with mirth. "Th' name's Angus by th' wey. Nice tae mak yer acquainta-"

"Nocturne, " cleared Shadow, "His real name's Nocturne, but he finds it too effeminate so-"

"Noc, then!" the other interrupted, slight annoyance present in his voice, but otherwise kept a happy face, "Sin Stick-in-the-mud 'ere wilnae let me huv ony fin, ca' me Noc!"

"Don't feel the need to indulge him though. Nocturne is fine."

"Jerk."

"Moron."

"Dinnae listen tae him. He's juist an insufferable eejit."

"Says the guy who calls himself Angus. Seriously though? Of all names, you pick that one?"

"It means unnaturally strong, ah will huv ye knae. Veary fitting if ye ask me."

"Fitting for me? Yes. Fitting for Knuckles? Yes. Fitting for you? No. Something fitting for you would be something like Cambeul."

"Ah dae NAE huv a crooked moath!" **(A/N: sorry for anyone named Cambeul. This'll be our little secret, 'kay?)**

"Look at yourself in a mirror and then I'll believe you."

"We huv th' identical faces."

"I don't get my face punched every day."

"And wheu does th' deid?"

"You deserve it."

"Ye dae realize ah huv a bomb duin tae detonate at ony moment richt?"

"Yeah, so?"

"Dinnae ye think ye shuid neutralize it or something, afore ah blaw a' o' us up?"

"Although it would be a relief to finally be rid of you, I don't want my friends to die. What do I do, bomb expert?"

"Cauld, mon. Dinnae thay teach ye that stuff at G.U.N? Cut th' green wire. Ah huv a pocket knaefe in mah back pocket."

"Wha- And you didn't try to escape!?"

"Ye knae me, ah lik' tae gae oot in stael. Ah used mah lighter tae burn th' rope tying mah body tae th' chair. Coudnae git far though, efter that. Bit ah knew ye wid need something tae deactivate th' bomb. If ah hud used it, thay wid huv confiscated it, 'n' we wid be in deep shit richt noo. Proud o' me yit?"

"Not in the least, ya pyro."

True to his word, Noc did have a knife in his back pocket. Shadow had it specially made and had instructed his brother to always keep it somewhere close. He didn't expect him to listen though... Guess morons do have their random bouts of intelligence now and then.

"Fire is art, mah frend. It represents rebirth, lee 'n' death a' at th' saeme time. Yer th' yin in error, as ye dae nae see th'beauty o' this element. Did ye knae that in greek mythology, fire wis a gift frae th' titan Prometheus fur he teuk pity ower th' human species? This resulted in Zeus makin Pandora 'n' giein' her th'beux that unleashed a' evils, efter knaen as Pandora's beux, 'n' chaining Prometheus tae a rock 'n' huv his liver eaten by an eagle each day 'til Hercules freed him sae he cuid..."

Then again, maybe not.

The knife was made of high-carbon steel, not that easy to acquire nowadays, so it was very sharp and easy to handle, but it also rusted if not dried up. When Shadow flicked it open, he deemed it very well maintained. It could have actually passed off as never used, but the various dents in the cocobolo wood handle stated the contrary. Shadow didn't even want to know what his brother did in his free time to get those...

While this was going on, Sonic and co. were watching in awe/disbelief the conversation unfolding between the two. It was just... out of this world, for lack of better and still censored expression. Their brains weren't at their best functioning state right now.

They did look alike, and bickered like brothers, but that wasn't the most shocking yet. What really leaved them in a mute state of shock was the fact that there was a _friendly _and _smiling_ Shadow look-ali-family member.

Sure, you could pinpoint the differences, but like Nocturne said, they **had the same face.** It was... unsettling.

Espio, ever so cool and collected Espio, was first to recover.

"Um... Shadow...?"

"Hmm?" he responded, cutting the green wire with a flick of the wrist and not turning to face the chameleon.

The sound of their friend's voice seemed to snap the others back to reality. They now were all staring intently at Espio, awaiting the question.

There were a million things he wanted to ask: Why did they look so alike? How long have they been in contact? Where was Nocturne before this? How did Shadow manage to hide such a secret from him? Maybe he would go with a simple question.

"How are you two related by blood? Weren't you created in a water tank aboard a space colony?"

"'Twas synthaesized amniotic flooid actually." perked up the clothed brother.

All heads turned to the ebony hedgehogs.

"Of course, Nocturne, because that's what they're all asking themselves right now."

"A'm sure thay wur. Glad tae knae ye think th' saeme."

"I was being sarcastic, dumbass." Shadow sighed.

"Ah'm not that dum! Ah knew that... Jerk." he added for good measure.

"As you know," said Shadow, turning to face Espio, "we weren't born in the... _orthodox..._ way. We are, technically, related by blood, as the Professor used the same DNA for both of us. Nocturne is also a Black Arm/Mobian hybrid, like me. That also explains why we look like twins too, before you ask."

Espio opened his mouth again, but Tails beat him to it.

"Then how-why is Nocturne speaking like that?"

"Please, ca' me Noc..."

"Believe it or not, he CAN speak without an accent. He just insists on doing the contrary. He can also do German, Russian, Australian, British and lots more. So don't be surprised if he starts to talk completely differently one morning."

"Shadow..." started Rouge, "What _are_ you talking about?"

"The world was divided by nations before anthropomorphic beings like us came into existence. A lot of countries spoke different languages, thus they had an accent when they spoke another one. Actually, both the United-States of America and England had English as their language but they spoke it differently. The one my brother is speaking right now is Scottish, the country on the same island and north of England."

"Oh! Sae th' Professor DID inpoot somethin' else than battle tactics in that brain o' yours!"

"You're one to talk," Shadow snapped back, "At least, _I_ have some common sense!"

"That's not what I meant, Shadow." interrupted Rouge.

"Hmm? What did you mean then?"

"Why would Nocturne be there _in the morning_!?" she asked suspiciously.

"Oh. Well, since Nocturne just proved himself unable to stay safe alone, and you know about his existence now, I'll just make him stay at G.U.N until he finishes his training."

"'Training?'" Julie-Su repeated.

"Ah. Weel ye see... Whin ah wis created, th' researchers filled mah heid wi' cultural data 'n' street smarts and social skills, 'n' thus ah didnae huv mutch space left fur combat techniques. Thay didnae even relly tried tae train me physically onboard th' ARK." explained Noc.

"So he pretty much sucks at defending himself." summed up Shadow.

"You saying that tae be a hero, y'need tae be a cultureless idiot?"

"'Never met anyone who proved the contrary."

"Hey!" protested a very offended blue Hero of Mobius.

"So," Shadow turned his head back to the others, completely ignoring the faker, "I'm training him so he can protect himself from the doctor if he ever finds out about his existence. He already proved himself good enough with knives."

"Then," said Rouge, "if I understand correctly, your brother will be staying at HQ?"

"If the commander can't find him a room, he can move in in my quarters. Any objections?"

"Nope. Everythin' s awright wi' me."

"Is he why you've been acting strange for the past six months?" asked Charmy.

...

...

...

"I completely forgot about that." admitted Rouge.

"Me too." conceded Sonic.

There was a chorus of "me three" and "me number" before Shadow could talk again.

"Was I really acting so obvious?" he asked, a bit worried that his acting skills would need some polishing up before the next undercover operation.

"'Kept on spacing off, always tense, disappeared for hours on end..." enumerated Sonic, counting on his fingers each little unusual quirk.

"Aaaawwww! Wis leetle Shaddie worried aboot his big brother while he wis gaen?" teased Nocturne, poking his brother's left shoulder with his left index finger, a silly grin on his face. (Shadow had given him back his knife so he could cut off the ropes tying his hands and feet together. No way was he going to do it for him after all the trouble he went through just to save him.)

"Little?" asked Rouge, confusion clearly present in her voice.

"Big... Brother?" repeated Sonic, just as confused, feeling the headache coming back.

"Oh! Didnae we awready say it? Mist o' slipped mah mynd!" cheered Noc as he quickly trapped Shadow in a headlock, "Ah wis th' first yin activated! Makin' me th' elder!"

Needless to say, everyone's brain short-circuited. Again. For the second time that day.


	3. Chapter 3

**HEYA! So... Christmas exams are in three days and go on for the whole week and they're really really really important. ****I might not be able to upload the fourth chapter next week. ****Sorry.**

**EDIT: m'gonna upload new chap when I feel like writing. )B|**

**Disclaimer: All I own is the plot and Nocturne. All other characters blong to SEGA and Ian Flynn.**

_**My Dysfunctional Family**_

_**Chapter 3**_

_"Oh__! Didnae we awready say it?__Mist o' slipped mah mynd!"__ cheered Noc as he quickly trapped Shadow in a headlock, "__Ah wis th' first yin activated! Makin' me th' elder!" _

_Needless to say, everyone's brain short-circuited. Again. For the second time that day._

҉

The room smelled like cleaning products with a hint of baked cookies. The janitor that cleaned the place must have been a married part-time housewife with kids. The room itself had dull grey walls with a dull grey carpeted floor with dull grey chairs and a dull grey metal table. The only thing that wasn't gray was the dark glass panel on the other side of the room and the neon light bulbs incrusted in the walls, right below the corner where the wall and ceiling connected and above the one where the wall finished and the floor started.

The two brothers were sitting in the dull grey chairs, the same side of the table, facing the wall with the glass panel.

Nocturne had turned his seat the other way and had sat with his stomach pressing against the back of the chair. He wasn't sweating, even with that most definitely warm zip-up hoodie he wore, and he didn't fidget in his seat, but he still gave off the impression that he was nervous. He cupped his face with his left hand, elbow resting on the back of the chair, and kept drumming his right fingers on the table, eyes darting every now and then to the door. He didn't seem bored though, more like anxious.

Shadow, on the other hand, rested in a very relaxed position. He casually laid back on his chair, feet on the table, arms crossed and eyes closed. It wouldn't be a surprise if he was actually asleep.

Right after Noc had announced the age difference, the captain contacted Shadow again via his communicator. This time, he got the go-ahead to deploy the G.U.N soldiers.

The group then made their way to the evac shuttles in the nearby forest. The soldiers they had passed in the various hallways and corridors all froze when they saw two Agent Shadows passing by. It would have been too complicated and too long to explain though, so they just went on their way.

When they arrived to the transport shuttles, and were about to be greeted by the D'Coolette couple, both bunny and coyote were left standing by the entrance, mouth slightly agape. The brothers didn't even spare them a glance before making their way inside. Sally followed close behind and tried, emphasize on the tried, to explain the situation as best she could. It left the pilots still a bit confused, but they understood enough to get that the stranger wouldn't try to highjack the aircraft... Maybe.

The way back to the base went off without a hitch. Not long after takeoff, the voice of the captain patched through the shuttle's radio. He confirmed that the bombs were placed and that no legionnaire or G.U.N soldier were left in the vicinity of the building. Then, there was a countdown starting from ten. When zero was pronounced, the blast could be seen even from as far as they were. The blast looked like a giant dome of light before a pillar of black smoke raised into the sky. For some reason, Noc looked ecstatic.

And now, here they were. Shadow had taken the liberty to inform central command of a civilian coming, and specified that said civilian was his brother. Upon arrival, they were immediately brought to an interrogation room and left alone. The lady that had led them then came back, half-an-hour later, with a doctor and two bottles of water. The doctor didn't find any injuries, so they left, leaving the drinks.

It had been two hours since then. Shadow didn't show it, but his patience was growing thin. He knew there were people in the room, on the other side of the glass. Heck, maybe there was even the commander, or maybe Rouge! Both knew they were being monitored like lab rats, it had been a long time since they had felt that way, but only one was a hundred-percent certain that they were also being watched.

Finally, the door opened, letting in two guards (did they really think they'd start a fight?) and an average-height man. The two soldiers both took their positions on either side of the door, ready to draw their tranq guns at any moment. They had the standard G.U.N uniform on: blue short-sleeved shirt with the wine-red G.U.N crest on the shoulders and a black bulletproof vest on top. They had dropped the helmets though. The one on the right was a middle-aged man, maybe in his mid-thirties, with sandy blond hair swept on one side and chocolate brown eyes. The one on the left was a young woman in her twenties with dark hair tied into a ponytail and electric blue eyes.

The third human to come in was, estimated Shadow, in his late twenties or debut thirties. He had light brown hair cut short and stormy grey eyes, just like the overbearing color of the room. His face was serious, but carried an inviting aura to tell him everything you knew. He wore a night black business coat over a deep, forest green turtleneck, black dress pants that matched his jacket and recently polished leather loafers. On his left ring finger, Nocturne noted, was an evident discoloration on the base of the finger, probably from a marriage ring.

Shadow was racking his brain to figure out who exactly this was. He was sure he saw that face somewhere before... He didn't think he was G.U.N. More like some sort of civilian worker in the non-military branches. Tech? No. Medical? Neither... Psychology? Maybe. He hadn't thought that the commander would deem either of them, him or his brother, in need of a psych evaluation though.

"My name is Michael Kovaleski," started the human, in a deep, baritone voice, "I'll be asking you a few questions on behalf of your superiors. Don't lie, 'cause I'll know. You'll only make your stay here longer if you do."

"Is the commander in the other room?" asked Shadow.

His brother shot him a questioning glance, before turning back his head to Michael. Whoever his lil' bro was talking about seemed important enough, so he just let him do whatever. At least one of the two knew what they were doing.

"It is not my place to disclose such information." answered the evaluator.

"He might want to ask questions of his own, though."

"I'm right here, Shadow." sounded the Abraham's voice over a mike carefully placed somewhere out of sight, "I'll just use this if I need to express my input on things."

"Fine by me."

҉

"What is your name, sir?" was the first question.

The elder opened his mouth to answer, but the younger beat him to it.

"His name's Nocturne, before he spits out another random-ass name. You also adopted Maddox as a surname, right?" Shadow inquired, directing the last sentence at his brother.

"Aye. 'Twas th' name o' yin o' th' raerely kind researchers oan th' ARK. He wis a nice fella."

"The only reason they were 'rarely kind' was because you never appeared to your classes on time, sometimes not at all, and raided the kitchen almost every night. You're definition of 'mean' is wasting time chasing around an immature little brat like you because he's never where he's supposed to be. That didn't change at all over the years, either, it would seem." he eyed his older brother, clearly referring to the kidnapping earlier that day.

"Maddox..." wondered Kovaleski, as he searched through the dossier he had brought on the ARK incident. He skipped right to the list of the people aboard, "Maddox... Ah yes. Daniel Maddox, head of the east wing laboratory. I regret to inform you that he died of old age ten years ago."

"Och. Ah knew that. Managed tae track doon his faemily aboot four years ago. Hud tae expect it though. He wis awready quait far thro' his leefe afore th' shut doon."

"You hacked G.U.N's archives didn't you?" sighed Shadow.

Shock showed on Michael's face, but only for merely a second.

_Will have to optimise the security software, it seems... _he thought.

"Whit o' it?" the older brother defended.

"You did do worse since I met you... I'll let it slide. For now."

_Oh... that's right._ thought Kovaleski.

"Which brings us to my next question. How _did _you two meet?"

"Um..." started Shadow, "First time we ever encountered each other would be on the ARK. Then we didn't see each other for the next half-century."

"Ah didnae even knae whaur he wis, or that he wis even in staesis, fur they fifty years. Then whin th'nooze o' th' break-in at Praeson Island reached mah ears, ah stairted keeping tabs oan him. 'Twas kind o' hard tae dae sae, sin he wis operating under th' radar 'n' then wis seemingly deid in th' destruction o' th' space colony. Bit efter a' that drama, everything went smoothly. Ah didnae think mutch aboot interacting wi' him again, sin we barely did sae under Gramps'* care."

"But _something_ happened, because about six months ago, while Rouge and I were investigating Soleanna on opposite sides of the city, he simply walked up to me and declared he was my brother."

"Ye made a hilarious faece whin ah said that, 'til ye stairted producing Chaos Spears in industrial quantity that is..."

"Amnesiac, remember?"

"Ah still thought ye wid remamber me! A'm unforgettable!"

"Whatever helps you sleep better at night... Who are you again?"

"Dinnae ye dare go Alzheimer oan me again, ye leetle prick." Noc menaced, shaking his finger up and down in an _if-you-do... _manner.

"Or else what?" he smirked.

"Ah will mak' yer leefe hell." The shorter-quilled one said.

"Oooh... I'm shaking. As if you're not doing that already." Shadow sarcastically replied.

"Sirs, please," interrupted the interrogator, "save your family quarrels for some other time..."

"Faemily quarrels? That's a neu yin..."

"Of course it's new, there aren't any old ones to begin with! First time anyone else than me knows of your existence in fifty years, remember? I swear, you forget more things than me, and I don't remember a lot these days."

"Jerk."

"Moron."

Michael cleared his throat, effectively ending the brothers' glaring contest.

"Back on track, please."

"Pardon." Nocturne sheepishly said.

"Sorry. What was your next question?"

"Well, according to the reports from the soldiers who participated in the shut-down of Space Colony ARK, there is a mention of a second capsule being launched about the same time Agent Shadow's did. Were you in that capsule?" he asked Nocturne.

"Nah. Ah wis in mah quarters, scrolling thro' some lab reports whin th' alarms gaed aff. Ah git up 'n' walked tae th' door tae see whit wis happening. It wouldn't huv bin th' feerst time we hud a drill 'n' paeple forgot tae tell me aboot it. Thing is though, whin ah opened th' door, ah wis met wi' th' barrel o' a gun. Tis a bet hazy efter that, bit tis safe tae assume ah wis shot. Richt batween th' iyes tae. Ye praebably huv me listed under 'aether experiments' or 'protatypes'."

҉

_It was late. Very late. Nocturne had advanced math lessons later that morning, but why would he care? He already knew; they programmed him to. A few months ago, he overheard the researchers talking about IQ and stuff like that. He knew he wasn't as valuable and good as his "perfect little brother", but that didn't mean he was incompetent either! They knew what they programmed in his head, what they made of him, so why did they have to evaluate and test over and over again? The classes were boring, so why should he pay attention?_

_"You should listen and do as your told." they would say._

_"You should be more like your little brother." they'd reprimand him._

_And be a stick-in-the-mud? Always taking tests, and exams, and evaluations? No _thank you_! _

_He really pitied him actually. He didn't seem to have any fun. That's why he always tried his best to make him laugh when they were allowed to hang out, which wasn't all that often, unfortunately. However, it wasn't the first time that he saw his lil' bro with that young blond girl. Jerry's grand-daughter, he heard the scientists say once. She seemed sweet enough, and made Shady smile. _

_He sighed. Things sure were complicated up here. He wondered if things on earth were any easier... Probably not. A billion times the population must mean a billion more problems to deal with. Right? That's what Danny** said anyway. _

_He stared up at the ceiling, letting his mind go over happier thoughts. Memories, actually. Like that one time when he snuck a bunch of little cakes in his room and the east-wing staff had to deal with an already hyperactive teenager on a sugar rush for about two hours. He had to do the dishes for a month afterwards, but he still though it was worth it. _

_Or that time when the scientists created a live blob of purple goo. They never did catch the one who mixed the test tubes around..._

_Oh, oh! And that one day when he and Shady dressed up exactly the same and covered there quills with the hoods of their vests. He also convinced the younger to act like him. The researchers were so confused! It was hilarious! The only ones who could tell them apart were the Ol' Man and that Maria chick, though... But they were really cool to let them continue the prank!_

_Of course, it couldn't be helped, his thoughts went back to his brother. They always did. It really bugged him off._

_He swung his legs over his bed onto the floor. He couldn't sleep, and the white ceiling wasn't that interesting. He could always read a few lab reports on his computer to pass the time and keep his mind off things. _Those_ were much more interesting than differential and integral calculus. His favorite report was the live purple blob of goo incident. Technically speaking, it _was_ his creation._

_A small smile on his face, he walked over to his PC. As he sat down, the ARK's standard screensaver (a black background with the white words SPACE COLONY ARK appearing randomly all over the screen) was replaced by the image of the city of Soleanna during the Sun Festival's opening ceremony, at night. That would be one of the first places he would go once Jerry was finished with all the tests and he would be sent on Mobius. _

_Rapidly, as if he'd done it a thousand times (which he did), he hacked the ARK's databases unnoticed by the security systems and clicked on the LAB REPORTS link. The screen turned black, and orange text popped up. _

_He scrolled down the page, looking for anything that might catch his eye._

_Bacteria survival under extreme circumstances... No._

_Natural re-growth of amputated limbs... Nope._

_Cloning humans in the womb... Neither._

_Artificial creation of self-sufficient being... Nopety-nope._

_Natural healing process enhancement... Nopety-nope-nope._

_Forcing coma awakening through gas... Nopety-nope-nope-nope._

_Artificial Intelligence Progress report... Already read._

_Damn. _

_They didn't do anything new since the last time he checked. _

_But he somewhat had to expect it, as it had only been two days since he did. _

_He skipped to page thirty-seven, as it was where he logged off after a good five hours of reading the day before yesterday. _

'Hmm...? What's this?'_ he thought._

_BIOLIZARD._

_Seemed interesting enough._

_He clicked on the link. Immediately, the image of a huge red lizard with some sort of weird machine on its back and tubes running down its neck to its head appeared on the screen. The title read: PROJECT BIOLIZARD and beside it flashed three words, like a warning sign. It read: TO BE ENCAPSULED. _

_Now _that_ piqued his interest._

_Before he could read further though, the alarms blared to life, red lights flashing. He jumped in his seat, surprised, before debating whether he should stay here and continue on or participate in what certainly was a fire drill. _

_He got up, choosing to be better safe than sorry. Alas, the possibility of a real fire was still very real. _

_Approaching the door, he heard the hurried footsteps of people walking down the corridor. Actually, it sounded more like running. Maybe there really _was _a fire?_

_Scanning his eye to open the door (they installed a scanner on his door after one of his too many night escapades, to always know when he was out), he heard someone yell instructions from the other side._

Strange... _he thought._

_The voice was low and husky. He knew no one on the staff had that voice. Was it a new intern? He sure sounded like a born leader!_

_The metal hatch slid opened to the sides, revealing a scene Nocturne didn't think he would ever see. A tall, fit human stood sideways to him, in a blue thick shirt and bulletproof vest. He also had a trench helmet on and orange goggles on his head. He had his right fore and middle fingers pressed to his ears, probably his communicator, and spoke in military lingo. Nocturne was too shocked to make any sense of it._

_The soldier glanced sideways. If he was shocked to see the ebony hedgehog, he sure didn't show it. He dropped his right hand to his side and reached for his pistol with his left. _

_Nocturne took a few steps back, his survival instincts screaming at him to run. But where?_

_His room was a dead end. And he wasn't fast like his little brother. He could always shove the man and make his way to Gramps and Danny, but would most likely be shot down before he could._

_With the straightest poker-face, the soldier squeezed the trigger._

҉

Throughout his whole speech, Michael paid close attention, as to make a thorough and detailed report afterwards, but his brain froze when Noc said he was shot.

A few (awkward) seconds passed before the commander's voice echoed through the room.

"I'm sorry, I must have misheard. Did you say you took a bullet? In the forehead?"

"Aye."

...

...

...

...

"Shouldn't you be dead!?"

"Ah! Weel ye see, ah harbor th' powers o' a holy bein' and-"

"Shut up, Nocturne." said Shadow, a bit irritated at his brother's pseudomania***, "The real deal is that, as you might have deduced by the lack of intel and reports about him, Nocturne was considered a failure by the scientists working on PROJECT: SHADOW. The goal of the project was, initially, to find a cure for Maria's disease in the professor's interest and a soldier that would retrieve the chaos emeralds in Black Doom's interest."

"Fur th' fighter pairt, ah awready explained it tae th' ones that hud accompanied Shadow oan his mission. Th' researchers created me wi' mair brains then brawn, 'n' noo Shady's training me sae ah kin tak' care o' masell noo that a' body knaes ah exist." he cheerfully said, his right arms looping and resting on Shadow's right shoulder as he lightly punched the younger's left arm.

"As for finding a cure, the goal was a faster and better healing metabolism. For example, contrary to popular belief, I am not immortal. I survived the ARK's destruction because the doctor retrieved me and kept me alive in a cryo tank until I healed. My immune system, on the other hand, makes me unable to die from disease or age. My healing rate is also ten times faster and more effective than normal. Thus making mortal injuries for normal people, normal wounds that'll heal in time for me. In other words, I can die, but not easily."

"Bit ye'r strawng 'n' faest enough tae ne'er git severely injured. Sae ye'll preyty mutch ne'er die." shrugged the elder brother.

"It's not a guarantee, though."

"Ah, oan th' ither haun, experience 'death' lik' some sort o' coma. A din knae whit exactly th' researchers did tae mess me up, bit ah literally cannae kick th' bucket. Whin that soldar shot me in th' heid, mah functions sic as brain activity, heartbeat 'n' pulse a' stopped. Bit whin ah wis aboot tae be cut up in autopsy, thay simply stairted workin' again. Ah remamber giein' th' piur doctor th' fraeght o' his leefe. Tis a guid thing tha' th' hit ah gave him wiped his memory claen."

"Are there any more questions?" asked Shadow.

"Actually, there is." stated Michael, "We understand that you kept your brother's existence a secret as to protect him from people like Doctor Eggman and the like, but such secrecy will have to be investigated to make sure you haven't any more things hidden. We cannot let G.U.N's security be possibly compromised. It's protocol. You are to stay at the base for an indefinite amount of time. What we would like to know is if your brother will interfere with any of our activities."

The elder was about to respond, but was cut off by Shadow. It seemed to happen a lot these days...

"He won't be a problem. Just don't let him near any accelerant or he'll start a fire. Also, don't believe anything he says before double-checking with another source."

"We can do that."

"Ur we finished thein?" piped up Noc.

"I believe so. We'll have to keep you under surveillance until the investigation on Agent Shadow is cleared, though." said Kovaleski, closing his dossier and evening the pages by taping the sides onto the table.

Nocturne turned to his younger brother, gave him a nod of approval (?), and stood up.

"I'll be in th' cafeteria then. Dae a'm needin' a guard tae accompany me?"

"There will be armed guards in the mess. They will take action if you do anything out of line."

"Harsh." he winced.

"Elevator is down the corridor to your right. Cafeteria is at the first floor. Just follow the directions on the walls." instructed Shadow, not even turning his head to look at him.

"Aye, aye."

He went on his way, his footsteps barely making any sound. Shadow sighed, then groaned. He stood up and walked to the door. Stepping a foot outside and keeping his balance by holding the doorframe with his right hand, he yelled:

"You're strictly forbidden to approach the kitchen and empty the vending machines, too! And try to keep your lies to minimum, idiot!"

"Tween telepathy sooks!" yelled back an identical voice.

"We're not twins!"

"We share the same DNA!"

The ebony hedgehog sighed and stepped back inside the room. Michael was confused by this. Didn't he say they were finished?

"Are you not going to leave?" he asked.

"I've got something to tell you. All of you." he answered, directing that last sentence to the ones on the other side of the glass panel.

He sat back down, leaving his feet on the ground this time.

"Is this about your brother?"

"Yes."

"Then shouldn't he be here?"

"It's hard for him to talk about it. So he lets me do it."

"... And what is this about?"

"Well..." Shadow started, seeming a bit hesitant, "How can I put this... Like I said, Nocturne won't cause any trouble. This is just a warning. And I'm not saying this just to insult him. Let's just say that he's not... the most mentally stable of people."

҉

_* Gramps: Nocturne calls Professor Gerald that along with Jerry, Old man, or some kind of combination or variation._

_** Danny: Daniel Maddox. The guy that Nocturne really liked._

_*** Pseudomania: Obsessed with lying._

**Please drop a review before you leave! Positive, instructing or just crack, I don't care! Q_Q PWEEEAAAASE? *Puss in Boots of Shrek eyes***


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